So Facebook decided to come up with a made-up holiday that sees people around the world cheerfully sharing algorithmically-made videos.
We get it. The best way to celebrate your friends is to irritate them by posting cringe-worthy videos and chase them off Facebook until it’s all over.
The holiday is traditionally celebrated on the fourth of February, which is the date Facebook was founded back in 2004 but this year we get to start two days early — lucky us. If you haven’t seen the videos on your feed yet, they’ll get there soon.
It’s unclear why Facebook decided to start celebrating two days earlier this year but they’ve come out with all guns blazing – there’s a dancing humanoid robot made out of ‘like’ and ‘reaction’ emojis. Yeah.
Mark Zuckerberg wrote:
Friends Day is a day to celebrate friends. It’s also Facebook’s birthday, but today isn’t about celebrating us. It’s about friendship.
Seriously? When the last time somebody made a ‘friend’ on Facebook or was re-united with old pals on the site? It ain’t 2009. Today’s Facebook just isn’t what it used to be. Why is Facebook still used by people? We’ll give you an honest list:
Facebook works as an RSS reader for news.
It’s required to log in to other websites. No, we don’t wanna go through an entire registration process. One click login please.
It’s an excellent platform to throw shade and people and to let them know you’re doing better than them.
Friend 1: Just got a Mercedes. Here are 102 pictures of me with my Mercedes. I have a Mercedes.
Friend 2: Yep, time to unfriend you.
People can use it to share their spreading awful and unwanted opinions easily. Let’s face it, 140 characters aren’t enough for dramatic rants.
Because Facebook offers free video/text messaging. Don’t wanna give your pesky relatives your number? We thought so.
Because it’s the easiest method for remembering birthdays.
And lastly, Because it’s better than Google+.
You’ll be stuck watching cheesy videos full of people you probably haven’t talked to in years for the next few days. Suck it up because it’s Friends Day.
If you’re one of those who absolutely must share these videos, at least check out the Friends Day Page where you can edit the images to something a little less cringe-worthy and embarrassing. We don’t wanna see pictures of you with your ex’s family. Seriously, have some self-respect.
Happy Birthday, Facebook — we’ll be hiding till this fiasco dies down.
Read what the victims of #FriendsDay have to say:
*opens Facebook*
Sees only Friends Day videos!
*closes the app* pic.twitter.com/fVrLorVauz— Shruti Sud (@shrutsays) February 2, 2017
Facebook is trying to become relevant by doing irrelevant things. What the heck is “Friends Day Video” ?
— Vitamin Deficiency ! (@shubhispace) February 2, 2017
“Happy Friends Day, Philip! Here is a montage of photos of you with people you don’t speak to any more. Enjoy!” – Facebook.
— Philip Ellis (@Philip_Ellis) February 2, 2017
THE FACEBOOK FRIENDS DAY VIDEOS ARE AWFUL. WHY WOULD YOU POST THAT? MY EYES.
— Deeyoncé with twins (@PrincessMissDee) February 2, 2017
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