Mothers are a lot of things, they are concerned to the point that defies logic, they have PhDs in the art of overthinking themselves into panic attack. All because you forgot to pick up the phone. But this one mother took the entire motherly instinct one level up when she decided ask the internet a question that was only going to wreak havoc. Apparently, this woman’s daughter is getting married and she is unhappy because she picked a maid of honor who has a visible limp. No one could have been more insensitive in their attitude towards someone who is differently-abled. The woman went on to narrate how the wedding’s aesthetics could be dampened if Katie (her daughter’s best friend) was to take part in it.
This woman posted a question in a column Dear Prudence on Slate and has since then been receiving flak for it. The post which was titled: Daughter’s friend being in the wedding. Here is what she wrote in the post:
My 27-year-old daughter and her best friend, Katie, have been best friends since they were 4. Katie practically grew up in our house and is like a daughter to me. My daughter recently got engaged to her fiancé and announced that Katie would be the maid of honor (Katie’s boyfriend is also a good friend of my future son-in-law). The problem is that Katie walks with a pretty severe limp due to a birth defect (not an underlying medical issue). She has no problem wearing high heels and has already been fitted for the dress, but I still think it will look unsightly if she’s in the wedding procession limping ahead of my daughter. I mentioned this to my daughter and suggested that maybe Katie could take video or hand out programs (while sitting) so she doesn’t ruin the aesthetic aspect of the wedding. My daughter is no longer speaking to me (we were never that close), but this is her big wedding and I want it to be perfect. All of the other bridesmaids will look gorgeous walking down the aisle with my daughter. Is it wrong to have her friend sit out?
To which the columnist who runs the section, asked:
Ask yourself: “Do I sound like a villain in a Reese Witherspoon movie?” This girl is “like a daughter” to you, and yet you want to shove her to the side of your other daughter’s wedding just because she walks with a limp. It is not only wrong to have asked your daughter to consider excluding her best friend over this—it is ableist, and cruel, and it speaks to a massive failure of empathy, compassion, and grace on your part. You must and should apologize to your daughter immediately, and I encourage you to profoundly reconsider the orientation of your heart.
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And Twitter wasn’t far behind to retaliate, especially over the fact that “we were not that close” and is reading between the lines of her insensitive post:
I am no longer of this earth. This letter has killed me. https://t.co/McnBl7wsfS pic.twitter.com/vAK3xsWiVh
— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) September 6, 2017
No worse than my niece telling her cousin she’s not a bridesmaid any more as she wants only hot bridesmaids in wedding party, asks another.
— Linda Graovac (@GraovacLinda) September 8, 2017
my first thought is that the asides “she’s like a daughter to me” and “we were never that close” together constitute an entire article
— militant lorax (@theshrillest) September 6, 2017
My favorite part is that she said Katie was “like a daughter to me,” b/c apparently, to her, that means “not that close and I’m mean to her”
— David Harris (@Hero_Complex) September 6, 2017
“she is like a daughter to me in that she probably doesn’t like me just like my real daughter doesn’t like me because I’m a fucking monster”
— Melissa B. (@Buote) September 6, 2017
Artist’s impression: pic.twitter.com/be4JmWyj2X
— Dan Kelly (@ObiDanKelnobi) September 7, 2017
“Look, sweetie, I know it’s confusing, but you need to choose your best friend carefully because that’s how I have to ruin your wedding”
— Sarah Werner (@wynkenhimself) September 7, 2017
Just when we thought we were celebrating inclusion and diversity, someone or the other comes and screws with it.
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